two faces

dating outside of your race
dating outside of your religion
dating beneath your wealth
dating within your own gender

all fuel the rage that burns in the belly of the right wing American.

you can not have your cake and eat it too!

if you hate war and hate soldiers and hate the government.... that is your right as an American. but don't sit back and take government assistance, or want the military to come in and clean up your town.

if you have any tattoos
any piercings
use beauty products
plastic sugary
color your hair
ware clothing that is revealing in any way
talk back to your husband
disown your family because of who they are
YOU ARE A SINNER
you are not living a Christian life, so what makes your sin any less than my so called sin??
if you go by the Bible, it clearly states that all sin big or small is all a sin in Gods eyes.

check yourself before you try and "fix" someone elseour worl

My Life

From birth, it started rough
An abusive Mother
A father who loved drugs

Growing up with the old
I didn't fit in
Unfortunately, for me
There were no friends

I did everything I could
Yet, remained misunderstood

When everyone said I was trouble
And I'd be better off dead

I vowed to prove them wrong
And became the person I am instead:

I became more compassionate
And began to work for others
I even made a conscious decision
To forgive my mother.

I distanced myself from those who hurt me badly.
I even made plans to follow my dreams.

Though I've suffered many losses
My life wasn't meant to win

I was always resilient to the hurting feeling.

I've suffered much, my love
This is true

But there is nothing that hurts more than the thought of losing you.

Thank you Sean Matias

Written: 5/19/2015

I was taken back by your text message
"You wanna kick pads and hands? Let's do some mma training."
I thought you no longer did that.
After losing X amount of matches I retired.
Ya I know, reader, I said I would never quit. Who knows, I
now-a-days fight to write.
That day I should've eaten before 5 p.m.
Presley walking around the living room with a stalking finesse
after I put my socks on him.
The 2 other pets "Stun Spore" and "Poison Powder" the Geckos are living
within the cracks
and I haven't seen Presley's best cat friend: "Confusion"
in several months.
I have to thank this man.
we had a fight late at the park with no face shots, went for the shoot
as you punched me in the jaw.
3 weeks later at a garage party you told me something about their
being nerve damage in your pinkie.
That night Karma drove me to her grandmothers.
"Grandma" I said, "Give me a wet cool towel please."
Blood was pouring from my nose
"Sean got in an altercation tonight."
"Oh my..." Grandma replied.
The next morning I stormed the downstairs yelling obscenities
about how I lost the fight. Where's my talent dammit!
the drive?! the inner strength?!
I would say that Pro took it away from me.
but then again this whore I was dating couldn't give insights or
opinions on my videos on the teachings of mysticism and
denomination poison because as she put it:
"I'm too infatuated with your face. Your so handsome!"
So I didn't quite lose the sun or visions of ocean waves.
You gave it to me Project, you dug your hooks deep.
A few months later with the help of a semi christian writer I
became published.
It's with a weeaboo website but i'll take it.
If I had won that match the poems would still be sitting in
dusty boxes
dying like the rest of the dumps and like Dickinson
Cody would throw the stack of my life's work into
orange flame.
Well
They aren't and i'm on my way to immortality.
Thanks for the loss sir

Words

Surrounded by books,

I sit here trying to find the words to articulate what I feel right now.

I could search every item for a clue

One that could help me express my feelings for you
Each time I find that these words won't suffice

But still I try

I have placed you so high

You live on a pedestal

I said I love you and this is true

But to me,
These three words still won't do.

To be continued........

This Dream

It lives inside of me
I try to be normal
But that's not my dream.

Why me?

I can't help but to dream
Unfortunately, I'm the only one who believes in me.
They say dreams are not what they seem
There's always ambiguity.

But, this dream....it lives inside of me.
I try to be normal, but that's not my dream.

Bitch

A woman with the ability to see through bullshit
Bitch
A woman that will not sleep with everyone
Bitch
A woman that cares what she looks like
Bitch
A woman that has standards
Bitch

Society would have you believe all women are nothing but bitches
But what lesson is that to pass on to our daughters and sons

I am raising a strong smart headstrong independent young woman and she will be called a bitch for being that that way

We need to teach our daughters that they are queens and should accept nothing less that being treated like royalty

list, wishes, and dreams

I have a list
I have wishes
I have dreams

I stick to the list because I have a child to take care of and she deserves nothing short of perfect
I keep wishing for the love I know I do not deserve because I long for it
but my dreams they are gone

a dream for a large farm with a beautiful plantation house with a beautiful balcony that wraps the entire second story
with horses running in the pack of the property
grandchildren running in the back yard
beautiful flowers blooming in the front yard
a swing on the front deck where my husband and myself would sit sipping sweet tea while the sun was setting
healthy children with healthy children of their own
pure happiness

Your Home

Today you were on my mind
Not too much more than yesterday,
Not quite as prevalent as the day before
But you were indeed on my mind.

My thoughts: What if I was the more powerful one, the one with all the self-control, the one who wouldn't allow myself to feel what I knew to be real,
Would I still think of you the way I do? Would my heart still beat for you?
My mind: How could something so intangible be so destructive?
To think, to feel, to act upon something so pleasant, the same in which on the surface appears to be so distasteful

Today you were on my mind, and because I think of you,
I feel you,
because I feel you,
I love you,
Because I love you,
I need you.
And for that reason,
In my mind....
Is where you'll reside

Snipers of Dreams

Dreams are the bullseyes by which society knows who to target.

fire

something so beautiful
something so ferocious

it takes the form of a beautiful dancing swan
it turns onto a monster that can take a life

you can love and you can hate
they both take the same amount of energy
one is beautiful and one is ferocious
one is like a beautiful dancing swan
and one is a monster that can take a life

hate is like a fire
if you stoke it then the fire will grow
if you allow hate to take seed in your life you will never be free of the deep rooted vines that will strangle the life out of you

love is also like a fire
but this fire only strengthens you as a ceramic bowl taken out of a 400 degree oven

fire is fire
but what you choose to do with it is all up to you

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